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Unbreakable Bond
- BREAKUP/SEPARATION/DIVORCE
- DATING/RELATIONSHIPS
- PAST/FUTURE
DearJames,
I’m still in love with my ex of 3-years whom I lived with. We separated a year ago and then met months after, and still had strong feelings for each other. We then had a fight, and he doesn’t want to talk anymore. He’s coming to my city for the holidays (his family lives here), and I want to have a romantic reconciliation so we can be together again.
I feel he’s my soulmate and I’ve tried to break the bond so many times, and it’s unbreakable. I feel so sad because of this situation that my body hurts after a year of heartache. He’s being very difficult to reach and it’s like he denies the feelings he has for me. His best friend told me he still loves me and even mediums/psychics have told me that.
My question is, Is there any chance of a romantic reconciliation in the near future?
ro
Dear Unbreakable Bond,
To everything there is a season, a time to love, a time to laugh, a time to weep, a time to heal.
While bonds may be unbreakable, it’s not always in everyone’s best interest to hold onto them or pursue them further for that matter.
If the other half of the bond is “being very difficult to reach,” then it’s time to heed the message and back off.
If he does still love you, by acting prematurely to attempt to force a romantic reconciliation during the holidays, when he has clearly signaled otherwise, you run the risk of setting yourself up for a major disappointment.
Not to mention the argument that will ensue based solely upon your feelings of anger, hurt, resentment, and rejection.
Unrequited love, even when you strongly believe the other person still has strong feelings for you, is still unrequited.
It takes two to tango and by forcing the issue you force his hand while overtly showing yours.
This situation needs time and perhaps a lot of it.
If this union is truly meant to be, it will be. And if it’s not, you will come to know and accept that too.
Being pursued can be flattering. Being stalked, never is.
You need to redirect the emotions and energy you have for this man back into yourself, your wellbeing, your future.
Richard Back’s quote: “If you love someone, set them free. If they come back they’re yours; If they don’t, they never were,” is aptly applicable here.
Don’t spend your holidays looking backward over your shoulder attempting to force the issue, instead, be steadfast, strong, and resilient by focusing on you.
In the long run, you’ll achieve a far greater sense of self-value, self-worth, self-love, and self-esteem.
And those are far more attractive qualities than the ones you are currently contemplating displaying.
Give him and yourself the gift of time and freedom this holiday, knowing everything has its reason, season, and time.