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Friend Zoned


I am writing to you in order to know more. Why do girls slam guys into the jail of Friend Zone, and what shall a man do when he is Friend Zoned? Is there a chance card to draw in order to get out of the ugly zone? Could men create it, or just girls tend to do so?


Dear Friend Zoned,

Unrequited love has been around since time immemorial. It’s just now referred to as being “Friend Zoned.”

No one who is Friend Zoned should take it to heart. It’s no more a reflection upon the person being Friend Zoned than it is against the person who Friend Zoned. Chemistry is key, and when the attraction only goes one direction: hath does a relationship make.

You can’t force chemistry, it’s either present or it’s not.

As to why “girls slam guys into the jail of Friend Zone,” and whether there is a “chance card to draw in order to get out of the ugly zone,” one would be remiss if one didn’t acknowledge that 9 times out of 10, guys do the asking and girls do the replying. It’s just been the dynamic dance played out between the divine masculine and divine feminine archetypes.

Times are changing; however, it is still very typical for a male to make the first move. Thus, it feels like guys are being over Friend Zoned by the opposite sex. There is no magic card to pull, play, or toss about, you simply take your chances in love like everyone else.

Girls / woman encounter being Friend Zoned just like their male counterparts. The difference lies in the approach. Men can be all about the conquest, where woman tend to be more about the connection. What matters is that you be kind, respectable, and understanding. Be okay with hearing no or no thank you. Be good with being friends or acquaintances. Respect people’s boundaries.

Respect for all builds enormous, good will.

Good will that transcends the “Men are from Mars. Women are from Venus.” divide. Work on any insecurities you may have regarding this topic and be willing to review and change your belief systems on the same. This will go a long way in resetting both your expectations and feelings as it relates to being Friend Zoned.

These truths also apply to LGBTQIA+ interaction and attraction. No matter your attraction and desire being Friend Zoned is applicable across the board. It is simply a way one soul defines and conveys to another their level of interest and engagement. We must all do our best to not take it personally.

Ultimately, with 8 billion souls on planet earth, there are plenty of opportunities for platonic and romantic connections to be made. Life is a dance of chance and fate. HOW you dance matters. Be open to love in all its many forms, Friend Zoned or otherwise.