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Alone for So Long


Why have I been alone for so long? Will I meet someone?


Dear Alone For So Long,

Lots and lots of trust issues appear to be keeping you from what you desire, or at least what you say you desire.

It appears you know before it starts that any relationship will be over due to this reason or another. Over the years, and we’re talking all the way back to middle school on, you honed and developed the art of self-protection.  Everyone is somehow suspect in your world-eyes, and thus not to be trusted, and certainly not when it comes to affairs of the heart.

At some point long ago, you had your heart broken, and you’ve never quite put the pieces back together and recovered from the experience. You tell yourself you’re over it. You act as though you’re over it. And yet underneath all the neat and tidy togetherness you portray to the world you are still hurt, even damaged to some degree.

Of course, you’re not really damaged, that’s just an illusion of damage that stuck and took hold. You’ve yet to release it, kick it to the curb, and say once and for all, NO MORE – I’M DONE WITH YOU! Releasing yourself from a self-imposed prison isn’t always easy, until it is. In a moment of inner truth, you will realize that you have been the warden of your own incarceration, had the key to your cell the entire time, and the door was never locked but rather wide open. You just never felt safe enough to walk through it.

You came to compensate for the unresolved hurt in other ways.  Blame got the better part of truth and reason whether it was aimed at yourself or others. Over the years you just sort of slowly gave up on the whole idea, and ordeal. Now it’s time to meet someone meaningful. However, to do so, you must first reconcile yourself and that’s been the off limits, taboo, tucked away block for why you’ve been alone for so long.

You are beyond lovable. You need to believe it yourself first before you expect another to show, prove, and affirm it to you. No one can fill that which is another’s responsibility.  One may assist; however, they cannot do it for us. It is simply impossible. And imagine if they could; it would mean one’s sovereignty and wholeness are dependent upon another being.

Every person, place, or thing that enters our lives does so for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. They are a mirror by which, when we care to look, allows us to see, experience, and feel ourselves.  They are characters in our own unique play, playing the role our soul asked them to play. Nothing more. Nothing less. All absolutely divine and neutral.

As you work to resolve these long-held issues, never for a moment stop beaming your brilliance, beauty, and light to others. In time, your inner and outer worlds will align in what can only be described as an epic moment of self-love, bliss, and unity. That is when, from out of nowhere, you will finally meet the one who no longer completes you, but rather compliments you.

Many Continued Blessings to You.