Home The Latest Ask About Advice Consultation Tools Resources Media Testimonials Radio Show Boutique Community Videos Charitable Foundation Charitable Giving Thank You

photo credit: Phuangphet geissler/Shutterstock.com ©
Alone For So Long

Dating , Relationships , Future


Why have I been alone for so long? Will I meet someone?



Dear Alone For So Long

Lots and lots of trust issues appear to be keeping you from that which you desire, or at least so you say you desire.

It’s as if you know before it starts that any relationship will be over due to this reason or another.

Over the years, and we’re talking all the way back to middle school on, you honed and developed the art of self-protection. Everyone is somehow suspect in your world / eyes, and thus not really to be trusted, and certainly not when it comes to affairs of the heart.

At some point long ago, you had your heart broken, and you’ve never quite recovered from the experience.

You tell yourself you’re over it, you act as though you’re over it, and yet underneath all the neat and tidy togetherness you portray to the world, you are still hurt, even damaged to some degree.

Of course you’re not really damaged, it’s just the illusion of damage that stuck and took hold, and you’ve yet to really release it, kick it to the curb, and say once and for all, NO MORE – I’M DONE WITH YOU!

Releasing yourself from a self-imposed prison isn’t always easy…until it is.

In a moment of truth with yourself, you’ll come to realize you have been the warden of your own prison, had the key to your cell the entire time, and in actuality the door was never locked but rather wide open. You just never felt safe enough to walk through it.

So you compensated for the unresolved hurt in other ways. Blame got the better part of truth and reason, whether it was aimed at yourself or others, and then slowly over the years you just sort of gave up on the whole idea – ordeal.

Now it’s time to meet someone meaningful, but in order to do that, you first have to meet yourself. And that’s been off limits – taboo - tucked away, thus the block and why you’ve been alone for so long.

You’re beyond lovable, you just have to believe it yourself before you expect another to show, prove, and affirm it to you.

No one can fill that which is the responsibility of another. One may assist, yet they cannot do, it is simply impossible. And imagine if they could, ones entire wholeness would then be dependent upon another.

What happens when that person withdraws himself or herself from the other’s life for whatever reason? The story and its conclusion write’s itself.

The incompleteness, lack, hole returns, and the person finds that they simply bandaged or masqueraded that which they were meant to acknowledge, heal, and overcome themselves.

All people that enter our lives, whether for a moment, a lifetime, or somewhere in between are a mirror by which we may see, experience, and feel ourselves. They are characters in our own unique play; playing the role we asked them to play.

Nothing more. Nothing less. All absolutely divine and neutral on a soul level.

As you work to resolve that which is held within, never for a moment stop beaming your brilliance and beauty to others.

In time your inner and outer worlds will align in what one can only describe as an epic moment of bliss and unity, and THAT is when, from out of nowhere, you will finally meet the one who no longer completes you, but rather compliments you.

Many Continued Blessings to You.



comments powered by Disqus


Dear James
DearJames LLCⓇ 2022 All Rights Reserved
Terms of Use | Privacy Policy